**NOTE** - This was meant to be a comical piece, stats geeks calm down. Joe Nelson is well aware that PER is a valid statistic in the NBA.
As if infiltrating their math equations and coke bottle glasses into Major League Baseball wasn't enough, the stats geeks are now attacking the NBA. Their strongest weapon appears to be something called PER (Player Efficiency Rating).
It was developed by a nerd named John Hollinger. He wrote a book about basketball using math equations, square roots and other geek stuff. My sources say he wears a fanny pack. I can't respect that. I'm sorry, but I just can't.
Anyway, this PER stat is getting out of control. Hollinger takes a scientific look at pretty much every stat in the game and adjusts it based on minutes played and pace of play and creates one simple number out of it all. I don't like it. As a matter of fact, I despise it. And here is why...
If you look at the top five players at each position and draft a stats geeks team and an NBA fans team, this is what it could look like.
NBA Team: Steve Nash, Monte Ellis, Kevin Durant, Blake Griffin, Greg Monroe.
Stats Team: Jeremy Lin, Sundiata Gaines, Nic Batum, Ryan Anderson, Nikola Pekovic.
Which team do you think would win? I don't know about you, but I'm going with the team that operates with a Hall of Fame point guard, a dynamic 2-guard, the NBA's most versatile scorer, intimidating dunker/rebounder, and one of the most athletic centers in the league.
Based on the PER this should be a very close game. Each team is loaded with top-five PER talent. Some of these geeks actually think this would be a close game. If you're included in that mix, allow me to get stat geeky on you for a second.
Team NBA would blowout Team Geek, 103-72, based on each players scoring average. Now you can hit me with points per 48 minutes and suggest a player like Sundiata Gaines would be improved with more minutes, but the bottom line is that he doesn't get as many minutes/shots/rebounds/everything else as a guy like Kevin Durant because he isn't very good.
It's a very simple equation, stats geeks ... and yours is ridiculous and it needs to be wiped away from the NBA.
Please go away.