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To Donate, go to the Lupus Foundation of Minnesota's Website...

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Thanks to everyone.

LIVE Recap

Saturday

2:00 HOUR
Chris Hawkey and Jordan Bianchi stepped in to talk about his run for TS, bands and creating setlists, and how Scarlett Johansson sucks at singing.


3:00 HOUR
PA and Kevin Gorg joined us live from Canterbury Park to talk about the Preakness and they placed bets on a Canterbury race to try to win money for the Lupus Foundation. The Vikings were discussed and the fact that most candy is just cocaine for kids. Justin Gaard also started his spot on the show.

4:00 HOUR
Jim Stack of the Timberwolves talked about the NBA Draft Lottery and that his daughter had her prom tonight...and that the young man taking her probably should fear for his life. I also told a story about a cake-eating gal who had a dog in her pusre like Paris Hilton (first time Ive ever seen it in person) and show she went from a 10 to a 2 in about two seconds. Gaardsy recapped the retirement of Justine Henin.

5:00 HOUR
Preakness talk as Big Brown won huge against the field. The Superstar Mike Morris made his apprearance on the marathon show and talked about the Vikings and Chiefs July Scrimmage. Justin Gaard made his final thoughts for the show by taking a tennis call, and we continued to rip on Producer Paul Lambert's Jack Black look-a-like.

6:00 HOUR
Robyne Robinson from Channel 9 talked to the Superstar and I about what she goes through having Lupus. The Italian French Fry called in and was ridiculous as always. A caller asked us about bizarre injuries Star and I have had, and an emailer donated money when we played the latest Barbaro bit.

7:00 HOUR
TennaB joined as the girls from the Hooters Swimsuit competition talked about how they are going to win and end up in some calendar someday (good luck with all that). Also, Dot Com Tom talked about trying to find good looking girls in the quagmire of Wisconsin, and debated whether the Vikings or Packers would be favored in the NFC North this year.

8:00 HOUR
Jordan Bianchi gave us NACAR updates and predicted Carl Edwards and Kyle Busch would dominate, and was right as Busch and Edwards each won a heat, thus leading to the two of us each donating $50 ($25 for each heat win) to the Lupus Foundation of Minnesota. Idiot office habits were broken down as well...

9:00 HOUR
PMac started his trek to find women at the bars. My idiot roommate Jon sang into my voicemail because a gal requested a song and promised she would donate if he did. The Twins lost to the Rockies 3-2, and TennaB told a story about how a biker was pushing his bike on 494 the other day.....smart.

10:00 HOUR
We discussed bad engagement ideas, debated whether or not Grape Mike and Ike's exist, and the FAN's Lisa Sanderson joined us and brought shakes. We needed them.

11:00 HOUR
Former FSN sports guy Ron Johnson jumped on as we attempted to have Phil get more phone numbers, and by more I mean one.

SUNDAY

12:00 HOUR
Henry Lake makes his marathon debut and joined us while we were mentioning some movies that deserve/need to have sequels. The overwhelming response via calls and emails was "Rounders". Also, the After Dark Sludge & Lake edition featured a segment or two on the bizarre 2008 NBA Playoffs. My voice is starting to go. Not good.

1:00 HOUR
The Preakness and Big Brown's big win was ranted about, and Lake and I took calls on whether or not the disabled athlete should be allowed to participate in the 2008 Olympics.

2:00 HOUR
A lot of the callers wanted to talk about the Timberwolves. NBA Playoffs and NBA Lottery. Timberwolves.com writer Mike Trudell joined to discuss the NBA Draft. We also made fun of PMac disasterous run at the bars trying to get chick's numbers. (Note: Chicks in this case means attractive human females and not barnyard animals)

3:00 HOUR
We had full phone lines and a ton of emails discussing the greatest movie coaches of all-time. Some of the names included the coaches from Varsity Blues, A League of Their Own, Major League, Hoosiers, Happy Gilmore, Remember The Titans, Karate Kid, Saving Silverman and Any Given Sunday. Also, we talked about how cool it is to travel to see your favorite band, regardless of who that band is...

4:00 HOUR
Swear to God, we talked politics. Obama and that other guy, you know that old one. We also broke down the Minnesota Twins' 3-2 loss to Colorado and Delmon Young's season so far. Also talked about how good Kobe Bryant is compared to Michael Jordan.

5:00 HOUR
Are internet sports blogs dead and/or too evil? Plus we had a bunch of random phone calls from diehard nightowls that we completely appreciate.

6:00 HOUR
The boss Chad Abbott stopped in and we gave him a recap of what had gone down the first 16 hours and we also cmplained about overbearing youth coaches and how little it matters to be popular while in high school.

7:00 HOUR
Paul Allen joined and raved about Big Brown's crushing of the Preakness. We also threw the NBA Draft in the face of boss Chad Abbott and speculated what kind of impact a top two pick would have on the Wolves fanbase.

8:00 HOUR
PA and I were joined by Vikings Radio Analyst Pete Bercich for a couple of segments as we tossed up some Vikings talk regarding AP, T-Jack, McKinnie, EJ, and Jared Allen. Then before PA had to bail to go get ready for Canterbury he discussed a new experience he had out on the town the other night...Cougars.

DAY 22:

I've had "I Miss You" by Incubus on a 24-hour loop in my room for nearly three weeks now.

I google images of french fries as I lie in my bed shivering, longing to be near any type of french fry again. If fries could talk I'm convinced they would want me back too. I miss them so much. I miss just lying in bed with them and spooning with them. Come back to me fries, I'll even let you be the big spoon. Whatever it takes.

I've had these terrible thoughts in my head that the fries are happier now without me, like they love spending time with a bunch of rotten, old McNuggets or something instead. I'm better than McNuggets. I'll treat them as any beautiful potato product should be. With respect. I respect fries. Always have. Always will.

It's getting hard to be without them now. The past weeks have been a rollercoaster of denial, acceptance, excitement, depression, confusion and exploration.

Last Tuesday, I joined a french fry support group for people in my position. I admitted to the group I've had three regrettable mistakes with fries over the past six years and that I needed help. I told them I've given up fries completely for the next 50 days, and three of the people started to cry. They said, "Are you crazy? Who is going to love you if you don't eat fries?"

I didn't know what to say. They were right. Who is going to love me if I don't eat fries? It's a question I'm going to have to answer myself. I fear the answer is going to be a very lonely spot to be in.

DAY 14:

I'm two weeks into my fry fasting and I'm starting to hit the wall. I find myself ordering chicken strips without fries and feeling an overwhelming sense of guilt. Like Dillon having a threesome with just Denise Richards and another chick but not calling Neve Campbell to ask if she wants in.

Sidenote: "Dillon" is Matt Dillon, which I thought was assumed. I would hope the assumption isn't Dylan as in Dylan McKay of 90210 fame played by Luke Perry, or Pamela Anderson's son Dylan (clearly a 90210 reference itself, considering her other son's name is Brandon).

Life without fries is like a similie without a point. It's a waste of time. Clearly.

I've received a number of emails claiming to have spotted me eating fries in various locations throughout the Twin Cities. And by various locations, I mean geographically. I use my mouth to eat fries. Get your filthy minds out of the gutter.

Three times in the last week I've gone through the McDonald's drive-thru and ordered fries, but then pulled over and thrown them away one at a time. As each fry leaves my finger, I speak softly to them, wishing them luck and guaranteeing them all that we will meet again. 

Sidenote: This sort of forced emotion is similar to the end of every season of Real World. They all cry like they are never going to see each other again. In fact, they'll see each other at the Real World/Road Rules challenges, the Gauntlet, the Real World 20 Year Award Show, the Palms Ghost Bar and Planned Parenthood. So, they'll all have plenty of time to catch up.

I appreciate the support I've received from listeners, callers and emailers. I'm going through a very difficult time in my life right now without fries, and unless you've gone through it you can't imagine how much the support truly helps. Thank you for keeping me in your thoughts. It's because of you all I'm going to last these next 36 days.

Sidenote: If I fail, you people didn't support me enough, and I will forever push the full blame of the failure on my support group (you all) and accept none of the responsibility of my own actions. Thanks for nothing.